Friday, December 24, 2010

635. Muppet Christmas Carol

or...Never Send a Michael Caine to do a Muppet's Job

This is among my favorite holiday movies and my favorite version of Dicken's classic though horrendously overdone tale of a cranky old guy and his slow trek towards not being a douche. So, what makes this version a Christmas Carol better than the others? It's most likely the Muppets and a little Michael Caine for good measure, but mostly the Muppets.

Gonzo and Rizzo the Rat are great as the narrators. They work with a lot of the original Dickensian text and put a decidedly Muppetatic (I'll make this a word) spin on it. Also, I love Rizzo. This is especially surprising considering the latter of the Muppet's was a recent addition to the cast who aside from Bean have failed miserably at new additions into the Muppet cast (Pepe, need I say more?). Yes, this was probably the last movie the Muppets made before they became relegated to horrible TV movie-style schmaltz and obnoxious featured guests (as seen in the painful exercise of the Muppet Wizard of Oz). This movie was ALMOST ruined by the sappiness for sure. The songs are mostly an exercise in futility though Michael Caine can surprisingly, carry a tune.

This song i kinda like (though there is no Michael Caine singing)

i hate this frickin song. so sappy



Kermit and Piggy are naturals at depicted the Kratchit family and Fozzy was born, well, made to play Fezziwinks (or Fozziwinks). Sometimes, the Muppet roles are forced but in the case of Muppet Christmas Carol, the integrations are seamless. There is heart and some genuine laughs which recent Muppet movies have been devoid of.

My in-law's family watches this every Christmas eve and though I need a break every few years I continually find this a cute and enjoyable film. There aren't many contemporary Christmas movies that I can stand but this one stands out though apparently, I can't think of anything remotely inciteful or interesting to say about it. hmm...um...the ghost of christmas present is funny. he is big and eats a lot. Um...Merry Christmas?




About the Top 800 Project:

Using the They Shoot Pictures Starting List of 8800 films (LINK) and my Netflix ratings, I sifted through the list and of the 4500 films I’d seen, I selected a random number of films I liked more than the others. The list was about 812 films. I kicked off 12 to get an even 800. The list chronologically goes up to 2009. Each blog entry will list ten films, one of which will be discussed in detail. The ten films will then be posted toThe Top 800 Master List, a Google docs file compiling them. When the countdown finishes in what will be probably be a really a long time, I will begin discussing random films that I didn’t get to before.



Saturday, December 11, 2010

778. Requiem for a Dream: An Exercise in Morbidity

...Or How a “Favorite” Film Can Also Be a Painful, Enjoyable Trial

I don’t know anyone out there who would admit to have “enjoyed” watching Daron Aronofsky’s bleak addiction drama. In fact, one would be hard pressed to find someone who can watch this a second time. However, anyone that has seen it can probably vividly recall it. A film like Requiem teaches us a lesson that sometimes, movies aren’t fun to watch and that is not necessarily a bad thing. If movies are meant to move and make us feel, then we must take the painful with the inspiring.

What impressed me about Requiem was that it unflinchingly covered different types of addiction with the same passive voice. There was Jared Leto and an unrecognizable Marlon Wayans (of White Chicks fame) as heroin addicts, Ellen Burstyn as Leto’s mother, who becomes addicted to pills, and Jennifer Connelly, another drug addict/future prostitute and Leto’s girlfriend. The film covers their downward spiral into their addiction and doesn’t end well for any character.



::SPOILERS::

Leto ends up in a prison hospital with his arm amputated, Wayans ends up in a racist prison for drug possession, Burstyn winds up in a mental hospital getting electroshock therapy, and Connelly is the featured star of an anal sex show.

::SPOILERS::

It is safe to say that none of the characters end up in a terribly good place. All of them begin the film with hopes, dreams, and aspirations, and becoming slaves to their addiction which inevitably leads to their major major downfalls. They attempt to use drugs to achieve their dreams, to sell drugs or sex to open a store, or weight loss and sleeping pills to achieve game show success, and it overpowers them and enslaves the characters.

Requiem is really as dark it comes. The last scene is a fantasy vision of what could be had drugs not entered into their lives and somehow it makes the film even more depressing. That vision conflicted with the harsh and painful reality of their lives makes the tragedy of the character’s downfall even more powerful. In short, the movie ends without even the faintest glimmer of hope or redemption for ANY of the characters. A bum out ending is one thing, though usually there is slight hint that the worst is over for the characters. In Requiem, there is a distinct feeling that things will probably get WORSE for them. Aronofsky basically ends the film at what could be the characters rock bottom but with painful YEARS of ordeals in front of them.




Note: Puppy video included to perk readers up.


I can’t watch this movie again. This is really no way I can ever sit through it. I wanted to turn off the damned thing at a bunch of points throughout but I didn’t. Somehow, I kept watched and while I didn’t enjoy the film in the least, I appreciated it a great deal for its honesty and darkness. I have seen a few films that were more depressing (which will be discussed later on in the list) which also fall into this category and they all deserve special mention. Though by the time Requiem for a Dream ended, all I wanted to do is watch cartoons, cuddle my cats, and ponder if I would want to see Jennifer Connelly in an anal sex show (answer was yes).

About the Top 800 Project:

Using the They Shoot Pictures Starting List of 8800 films (LINK) and my Netflix ratings, I sifted through the list and of the 4500 films I’d seen, I selected a random number of films I liked more than the others. The list was about 812 films. I kicked off 12 to get an even 800. The list chronologically goes up to 2009. Each blog entry will list ten films, one of which will be discussed in detail. The ten films will then be posted to The Top 800 Master List, a Google docs file compiling them. When the countdown finishes in what will be probably be a really a long time, I will begin discussing random films that I didn’t get to before.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

788. Two Lovers and the Strange Journey of Joaquin Phoenix

...Or How to Sabotage Your Own Film

This is a tough ten in which to choose one to discuss. There are two excellent documentaries (Dieter and Control Room), some great golden age screwball comedies (Ruggles and Major), a twisted classic (Freaks), and a VERY nerdy-emphasis –on-science-science fiction flick (Cube) to name just a couple. Though for today, I am going to focus on Two Lovers, a forgotten and unfairly overlooked film from last year.

Perhaps things would have gone better for this understated drama if the star hadn’t sabotaged the opening. Starring Joaquin Phoenix, it was during the press tour for Two Lovers that he began his “career transition” to aspiring rapper. Showing up on Letterman incoherent and with a giant beard, the film took a backseat to the filming of what would become key plot points in I’m Still Here, Casey Affleck’s worthy directorial effort in the genre of gonzo filmmaking. Though without a doubt, I approve of the satirical nature of I’m Still Here, I wished he instead would have done this during press for the bland Departed knock-off “We Own the Night.”



The plot of Two Lovers is pretty simple. Phoenix plays a man recovering from a major mental breakdown and is slowly beginning to date and become a functioning member of society. He is in the midst of falling for a plain, though stable girl, when he meets Gwyneth Paltrow, a mysterious ingénue with a similarly dark past. She is a whole basket of crazy and poor Phoenix doesn’t know happened as he falls in love with her. Their story progresses, things happen, and resolve somberly though faint rays hope, as all good indies do. It’s a pretty simple story but one of the best character studies over the past couple years.

I am not a Gwyneth Paltrow fan. I consider her Sylvia Plath biopic (creatively called Sylvia— ::begin rant:: enough with the biopics that only use the characters first name as a title! I am waiting for a Hitler biopic simply called Adolf. I get the simplicity but at this point, it’s horribly clichéd. Enough! ::end rant::) to be a cinematic crime, and I’m not even a Plath fan. Though in Two Lovers, she brings her Royal Tanenbaums-best. She even received an Independent Spirit Award nom for her efforts and the film itself garnered a few nominations for film and direction. Phoenix also delivers out an amazingly understated yet emotionally powerful performance. It begs the question of why, if he was so good, would he chose to completely wreck the integrity of the picture by having an emotional breakdown (albeit, a fake one) during the press tour?


He became the story and press focus rather than the film itself which it too bad. The indie film loving audience was scared away from seeing the film in theatres and it disappeared without a trace and only finally received some positive word of mouth when the ISA nominations came out. Still, Two Lovers is back to being an underappreciated, obscure film and given that I’m Still Here underwhelmed, I wonder what the fate of the film would be had I’m Still Here not been a factor.

781-790

781 Ruggles of Red Gap LeoMcCarey

782 I Was a Male War Bride Howard Hawks

783 Cube

784 Angel Face Otto Preminger

785 Little Dieter Needs to Fly Werner Herzog

786 Freaks Todd Browning

787 Traffic [2000] Steven Soderbergh

788 Two Lovers James Gray

789 The Major and the Minor Billy Wilder

790 Control Room

About the Top 800 Project:

Using the They Shoot Pictures Starting List of 7700 films (LINK) and my Netflix ratings, I sifted through the list and of the 4500 films I’d seen, I selected a random number of films I liked more than the others. The list was about 812 films. I kicked off 12 to get an even 800. The list chronologically goes up to 2009. Each blog entry will list ten films, one of which will be discussed in detail. The ten films will then be posted to HERE, a Google docs file compiling them. When the countdown finishes in what will be probably be a really a long time, I will begin discussing random films that I didn’t get to before.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Tremors and the Subtle Art of the Horror Comedy

...or How a Movie About Giant Slugs Erupting form the Ground and Eating People Can Ever Be Considered Subtle




Tremors is a silly silly film. No one is going to argue that the premise is silly, the dialogue is silly, and the acting is even sillier. You can practically see the tongue in Kevin Bacon’s cheek throughout the course of the movie. In fact, Tremors is knowingly terrible. So why is this one of my favorite movies of all time if it’s so bad? Simple. It’s a benchmark in one of the most difficult film genres to pull off in existence, the horror comedy.

This oft underappreciated and under-grossing style is pretty rare given the number of both horror and comedy films that are released into theatres into every year. The ones that do get released often underperform and either find a cult following on video, like Tremors, or get lost to the ages, like Eight Legged Freaks. There is something inherently difficult about making death, gore, and mutilation funny and even harder to connect with an audience wanting to see it. The keys are to up the fantastical elements of the story, downplay the abject terror of the situation in itself, and to be careful of who to kill off. In all of these aspects, Tremors succeeds.

In a nutshell, the plot concerns a small town in the South in which giant underground snake/slug-like monsters invade the town and begin eating random citizens. The survivors who don’t get eaten take to the roofs to escape them and 90 minutes of slug shooting and perilious journeys to the ground ensue.

Tremors is basically Snakes on a Plane years prior to the blogosphere and when distilled down, both movies have a similar premise – giant slithery things trapping a motley group of colorful characters in a centralized location. The narrative order on these two films are practically! I rewatched Tremors recently and could practically hear Kevin Bacon yelling about he was getting pretty fucking tired about of all these motherfucking slugs in motherfucking small Southern town (note: If I continued my list farther, Snakes on a Plane would undoubtedly make an appearance).

Both films play on broad stereotypes. In Tremors, it was in the form of Michael Gross (the dad on Family Ties) and Reba McIntire (Reba on Reba) who play a couple of gun loving Southern people who just want to shoot the damned things. Between their trigger happy antics and Kevin Bacon pole vaulting from one house to another, the premise settles in nicely between sillier than silly dialogue, generally likeable characters that are fun to watch, and often humourous / horrific deaths of people getting eaten by giant Earthworms.




We can ignore the countless sequels that can be viewed on SyFy on any random weekend—when the “writers” of the movies kept trying to top the efforts of the previous film. Tremors on its own is a masterpiece of comic horror glory; a completely ridiculous effort that is a continual joy to behold. It also contains a lot of useful information to survive when the giant worms take back the Earth.


Here is the google docs link to the first ten films: #791-800